Sunday, May 10, 2009

Missing My Dear, Sweet Mum On Mother's Day....

My Sweet Mum passed away the day after Christmas last year. I actually started this blog to help deal with the loss. This will be the first Mother's Day I won't be able to have her with pamper and celebrate her. She was just the sweetest Mum ever.

This picture was taken just before she passed away. She was so sick, but my darling daughter and grandson came over for the day to be with her. She taught us how to make her famous Rhubarb Custard Pie that day. This is the very last picture I have of her. I'm so glad we took snaps that day. They say you can tell a lot about the body language in a picture......look how she has her arms all wrapped up in mine.........Isn't that just so sweet? Bless her little heart, she had bandages on both arms. Her skin was so thin that if you just bumped her she would bleed and she fell all the time. There is nothing worse than hearing your sweet Mum fall. It broke my heart.

During her last years she moved to a bottom floor apartment. The bedroom window faced the parking lot. She didn't live far from me so I'd zip over to see her often. I'd call when I was nearly there......when I drove up she'd be standing in that window waiting for me and when I left she'd stand there and wave good-bye. It made me so sad, even then. She loved me so much, and like lots of mom's, her biggest joy was just spending time with me. As soon as she opened the door she always said..........."HI HONEY.........I'll put on the tea"..........Gosh she was sweet.

My Mum at about 20.........wasn't she just a doll???

Sweet Mum...........she's about 60 here........She has her head cocked the exact same way!

I'm the kind of girl who needs to do "concrete" things when I'm hurting.......this is the memory jar I made for my Mum.........It has a picture of her, her favorite earrings, a tea cup she gave to me, her watch, a love letter from my Dad and a little sign I made for her that she had in her bathroom........"You are so loved, my sweet Mum".........I don't know why it comforts me, but it does.

I don't know if you've been over to St. Michael's Wife's blog, but she wrote this comment on my meant the world to me......I'll print it out and keep it with my special things.

Welcome home, sweet friend! Your Mum won't be here Sunday, but YOU will. And, obviously your Mum taught you a lot about being a great Mum because I'm sure that's how Dodi would describe you. So, in reality, you've been honoring your precious Mum the entire time you've been taking care of your own baby and HER baby! think how proud your Mum would be! Seeing the Mum YOU are is the most wonderful way you can express your appreciation for your Mum. She has passed the crown to you, and now is your time to allow Dodi to express her appreciation for you. And so the blessing within the circle of life continues!

Celebrate who your Mum was and who she raised you to be by choosing joy this week, dear one.

Isn't that just the sweetest message? What a great gal St. Michael's Wife is. If you haven't met this lovely Christian gal before, please go see her. You'll love her too! :-)

Isn't the blog-world just wonderful? I've met so many wonderful women here......And, I appreciate all of you more than I can say.

Thank you so much for your visit today and for taking a moment to read about my special, precious Mum.........the Mum who always thought I was the best thing ever.........the Mum I always turned to........And, the Mum who, when I had a problem, would say........."Ok Honey......I have to go now.........I need to go get on my knees. How blessed I am to have had my sweet Mum for 58 years!

I hope you'll get to spend the day with your Mum and that you're as lucky as I was.......

Happy Mother's Day to you and YOUR Mum......

Hugs and blessings,

PS..........Happy Mother's Day Darling Daughter O' Mine.......I love you so very are a WONDERFUL mother....I'm so proud of you and so grateful that you're mine!



  1. What a beautiful post about your Mum. My mother passed away in Sept. I posted about her last weekend. I pray for you today that you will be comforted by precious memories. Happy Mother's Day to you.

  2. What a precious post and tribute to your mother. My eyes are filled with tears! It is obvious that your mother had a wonderful daughter. I didn't have as loving a relationship with my own mother, but I miss her terribly just the same. Thank you for sharing from your heart. ♥

  3. I sure do share your loss, your grief....losing your mom is something you don't "get over" learn to live with it...but that is it...I have learned my own concrete ways to deal with has been 3 years...oh how I miss her...sometimes it still feels so surreal...A very Happy Mother's Day to you....I hope it is a blessing...we are headed out to Kitsap County for a bit...

  4. Happy Mother's Day!
    Hugs, Lisa

  5. I love the relationship you had (and will always have!) with your Mum. She's so beautiful in each and every photo you posted. You look so much like her - the same kind eyes and smile. Just beautiful!

    Aren't we so blessed to have been part of wonderful people's lives?

    Happy Mother's Day to you, dear Spencer! Much love and many blessings to you on this precious day,

  6. This is such a lovely tribute to your Mother! What a fortunate woman she was to have you for a daughter. It sounds like she knew it.

  7. How wonderful and sweet your message.. Yes, Your Momma left her footsteps imprinted on your life, and her loving hug on your heart.. You made me cry..Hope you get throught this day wonderfully, and thinking happy thoughts.. You were soo blessed to have her for soo long, and I'm sure she's smiling down on you !! Happy Mothers Day Spencer.. hugs ~tea~

  8. What a special relationship you had with your Mom. My mother had 11 children and was in her 60's before her last child married - I can't even imagine having more than two. She died 9 years ago and had the same problems your Mom seemed to have, she was on oxygen, she had bruises all over her arms (she bruised if you even touched her) and she fell and broke her hip while living with us. I still live with the guilt that she fell at my house - but she never blamed me. That's how Moms are.

    I wish you many blessings to you on this Mother's Day. Thank you for sharing your Mom with us.

  9. Cherish the memories... what a lovely tribute to your "Mum" and to the relationship that you shared.

    blessings. Dixie

  10. A wonderful gift to your mom by sharing her
    with us. Your right she looks like a doll!
    Have a wonderful Mothers Day filled with
    sweet memories.

  11. The photo of your mom reminds me a lot of my mom before she passed away too, those poor hands, with the skin so thin and bruised! It hurt to see her that way.

    Your memory jar is a lovely tribute.

  12. What a wonderful and loving tribute to your Mother!!! Your story of your relationship brought tears to my eyes...lovely!!!

    I love the memory jar you created...I might have to steal this idea!!! TOO SWEET!!!

    I hope you have a wonderful Mother's Day!!!

    P.S. Thanks for stopping by earlier...I love making new friends!!!

  13. Sweet prayers floating your way from heaven and around the globe. What a tribute you put together to honor 'The Greatest MUM Ever'

    Remember some funny memories and laugh in between the tears.


  14. What an absolutly touching post. I am so sorry that you are not able to spend the day with your sweet mum today but I hope you will be comforted to know that one day you will see her again for eternity.

    Have a wonderful Mothers day! xoxo

  15. Ah Spencer, I have learned that no matter how old we may be we are NEVER ready to let our MUMS go! How wonderful that you made a memory jar. I like that the lid comes off and you can continue to add to it! xo rachel

  16. I am a sister in a loss of a mother. Mine has been gone since 2003. There is not a day or week that does not go by that I don't think of her and my father who is also passed.

    The things she's say or do, is still with me. You just never forget do you.

    All mom's in heaven are looking down today, because they know we miss them and love them.

    Happy Mothers Day


  17. Spencer, you are so beautiful, what a precious and touching tribute to your sweet Mum. I love the photo of your and your Mum it is just so beautiful, it's a picture that has captured the beauty of love. I also adore your memory jar what a wonderful idea, I can see why it would bring you comfort, its filled with love.
    I am so thankful to God that He made our paths cross because you my sweet and precious friend bless my heart.
    Thank you for sharing the beauty of you. Happy Mothers Day, sweet one :)
    Love & hugs

  18. Know that your Mom is watching over you..I can't even imagine how hard this is for you...Your mom truly was a doll...Love that picture of her when she was in her 20's..Such a beautiful lady...Thanks for sharing the memories of your mother with us...

  19. Hi Spencer, thank you so much for sharing your love for your sweet Mum with us. I know she is
    looking down from Heaven with her heart full of pride and love for you, her sweet daughter.

    Thanks so much for stopping by today and I hope you have had a lovely day today.


  20. The memory jar is a great idea. I love the picture of you and your mom. It oozes love.


  21. What a special post for today, but I knew it would be, sweet friend. This morning as I stood in church with my arm wrapped around the slender waist of a precious twenty-something who lost her mother when she was a sophomore in high school, I was thinking of you as well, knowing that today would be hard. But I also knew that you would smile through the tears, remembering what a special Mum you were blessed with.

    Thank you for not just sharing your thoughts but for the picture of you and your mom. How beautiful the two of you are together! (And you are an absolute DOLL, my sista! And I'm so glad you are my blog buddy!)


  22. I have just found your blog and I am so glad. What a lovely post about your Mum. My mother was very ill about a year and a half ago and was not expected to live. We have now enjoyed two Mother's days that are gifts as she was fortunate to recover. My dad, though, passed away last year at the end of April and like you, I started blogging to cope with the loss. Even though the memories are there, there is nothing quite like that real smile and the sound of their voice. I will be back again.

  23. Such a sweet post for your Mum - the first year is the hardest!
    Thank you for putting your link on my post so I could see it...


  25. Spencer, That is just the most beautiful picture. I can see the love from both of you. Your friend's note says it all, doesn't it?

  26. Your such a wonderful daughter and on the last photo of your mother she looks very happy i think. And she was so beautiful and sweet when she was twenty! I would like to say much more, but ma english is not good enough.........

    Have a good time and thank you very much, for your nice comment,
    Hugs Jade

  27. OH, MY GOSH. This post is just so sweet! I feel like I practically know your mum! I have to say she's adorable and always was. And what a precious heritage you have to pass down. SO PRECIOUS!

  28. Oh Spencer, that memory jar is wonderful, I love that idea! You had a very special relationship with your Mum and I am glad you shared your memories of her with us today :)

  29. What a wonderful blog!! I'm going to go check it out some more. Laurie

  30. Your post was very beautiful about your 'mum'. I thought the memory jar was such a wonderful idea! I want to do that as a memory of my mother. No matter how long it's been or how old you get, you will always miss your mother. Thank you also for stopping by my blog and leaving your comment. That was so thoughtful. God Bless you. Patti

  31. Hi Spencer...

    I just read the sweet note that you left for me and wanted to come over to say thank you for your soooo sweet comments!!! So happy that you came by for a visit, my friend!!!

    Well my friend, I really can't say that I know how you feel as I still have my mama! I'm so sorry for your loss, Sweetie!!! Of course, there really are no words that anyone can say to make it better but your dear friend said it so well...and the sentiment is a wonderful one...I hadn't thought about it quite like that! What a blessing!!! My husband lost his Dad just 2 days after Christmas...I just know that this coming Father's Day will be a difficult one. I think I will share your friend's words of comfort and wisdom with him!!! Thank you for sharing just a bit of your Mum with sweet, my friend!!!

    Warmest wishes,

  32. Your life echos mine in the loss of your Mom. It is hard no matter how or when we loose them. My Mom has been gone since 1996. It doesn't get easier but I think it gets more managable.
    Thanks for visiting my blog!

  33. Thank you for sharing this loving tribute to your mom..I love the little every day shrine you dedicated to her.It is precious.You both look great..I love her arm around you too:)
    I would have given the world for one more time~

  34. What a beautiful tribute to your Mum. I'm still making my rounds from Pink Saturday and am glad that I got to read this post too.

    Enjoy your memories!

  35. Thank you for coming by my blog and saying hi! I think we'd all feel just a little stronger with a lovely tiara and a cape! Your blog is beautiful! What a lovely tribute to your mother! I am sorry for your loss. The loss is still very fresh for you. You were truly blessed to have her! And obviously the apple didn't fall too far from the tree! I love the idea of a memory jar! I'm already thinking of things to put in one for my younger sister I lost in 2002 and my father in 2005. My mother is still alive and lives in an independent living facility. She's disabled from a stroke and she always apologizes that I have to do so much for her. I tell her it's like birthdays, much better than the alternative! Your blog has reminded me to be sure and cherish her every minute I still have her! Thank you, and God Bless! Lauralu :)

  36. I feel exactly the way you do-

    Isn't it nice to know there are people in the world who do?


  37. I will never outgrow the love or need to be parented. This tribute to your mother made me cry. Truly beautiful! I love the photograph...

    I know she is watching over you...this very minute!!!

    Now...please share about your lovely name. I love it!


  38. What a sweet, sweet post and tribute to your mom. That memory jar is beautiful.

  39. I am so sorry for your loss. Your mother was a wonderful woman...I'm sure she's smiling reading this beautiful tribute you made for her! :)

  40. What an honor it was to read this post! You must have written this amazing tribute to your Mother through tears! It's so beautiful. I kept it together until I got to the memory jar! Wow!!! I still have my Mother but lost my Father about 12 years ago. One of your commenters, Marilyn, wrote, "it doesn't get easier but I think it gets more manageble." I so agree. Every day there is the realization that they are gone but with time, we become functional survivors! :-)

    Thinking of you,

  41. Such a lovely post and tribute to your mom. Her beautiful spirit shines through her beautiful face. Sometimes I think that love stitched into our hearts is true wealth. I just know that she is shining down blessings from heaven.

    Blessings, Karen

  42. Oh Sweet Spencer,
    This is such a lovely tribute to your Mum. I sure know just how you feel though my Mom was here with me until she was 75. It still seems so surreal. We know our Moms longer than anyone! I dreaded deep inside the knowledge that one day she wouldn't be here with me anymore. I asked God not to take her from me quickly and it wasn't until about 2 years into her Alzheimers that I realized He answered that prayer and was allowing me a long goodbye. It was indeed a precious time that I will always cherish. I always knew when Mom was getting what I said even with her loss of cognitive ability. I could tell in her eyes.

    I love this photo of you and your Mom. I sure wish I had one of me and Mom. Gentle blessings to you, sweetie. May God's peace fill your heart and His tender mercies carry you through.

    If you ever want to chat you can email me at

    Praying for you,

  43. Hi Spencer,
    What a beautiful tribute to your Mother, I too have the pain of losing my Mother. She passed away in 1981 at the very young age of 47. I was only 19 at the time, so I feel I never got the chance to have an adult relationship with her, I miss her everyday.

    I love the Memory Jar, I hope you don't mind but I would like to make a Memory Jar of both my Mother and of my precious baby son Nicholas.

    I have set up a memorial blog called Eternal Names By The Sea, to honour our precious lost loved ones, and I would love to be able to add to your Memory Jar, by writing your Mother's name in the sand, near the beach where I live, and take a photo of it and then email it to you, if you want me to?

    The link to my blog is
    and on my blog page there is a link to my memorial page.

    Our Mother's were very special and can never be replaced.
    How is your Daughter doing after her surgery? I have been praying for her.

  44. Dearest Spencer,
    What a marvelous tribute to your mum. She reminds me so much of mine, really. Her sweet demeanor, the way she cocks her head to the side in photos...I cried. The sweetness and thoughtfulness of these ladies breaks my heart. How tender and sweet the love of God is through our mommies. I can't express here in this small space what your post means to me, and thank you for visiting me. I am adding you to my list of friends! Blessings, Anita

  45. I am so sorry for your lost...

    You have a lovely blog!

    Thank you so very much for your sweet comment on my blog..!

    Bless you!

    Hugs, Jenny in Sweden

  46. I'm late getting here, but I loved reading about your mother and your lovely relationship with her. What a beautiful lady she was, and the closeness and love you shared just shines so brightly in your tribute to her. larie

  47. Hi Spencer:
    #1 What a cool name you have.
    #2 I love your husbands backyard where he grew up as I use to spend the summers on North Shore (Oahu) because I lived & breathed surfing : ) I'm too old (60) and too fat now but I go over to Oahu a couple times a year and the memories flood back : )
    #3 I cried about you loosing your Mum. My Mom will be 100 in June; has dementia but it is okay because it doesn't hurt.
    My oldest sister, who is 80, lives with her. She knows who I am when I call and is thrilled when I walk in through the front door : )
    Your blog is delightful and I will definitely come back to visit again

  48. Hi Spencer:
    #1 Love your name
    #2 I identify with your husband's love of surfing growing up; I did not grow up on Oahu yet my Dad made sure I got to the North Shore so I could surf every summer (because I thought I would die if I did not surf over there).
    #3 I am so sad with the loss of your Mum. My Mom will be 100 in June. I love her so totally and I cried reading your post : (
    My Mom has dementia; yet, like she told me in the beginning, it is no big deal because it does not hurt and what does she care if she doe not remember what she had for breakfast and that makes for her great attitude : )
    Thank you for sharing your love for your Mum, hubby and your life!!!
    I will be back

  49. I was so moved by your post and your lovely photo of you with your mom! This was my second mother's day without my mom and it sucked. She died as a result of lung cancer in 9/2007 and I miss her terribly! Thanks for sharing your lovely thoughts!


Sweet and dear little Chickies....thank you so much for your comments. I read each and every one. I always try to make a return visit........sometimes I fail miserably... but you're alllll soooo special to me!

Many, many hugs!